25.

25.

That is 1/4 a century.

I don't know why this birthday has made me feel so much older, but it really has. Maybe because I can no longer say I am in my early 20s? Maybe because despite the fact that I feel 18, I have been married for 4 years and have 2 children?

When I first turned 20,  back in 2010, I had visions and goals for what I wanted my 20s to be like. I knew I wanted to get married to a ridiculously hot man haha. He had to be taller than me even when I was wearing heels and sing like an angel. More importantly, I wanted him to be a return missionary and a worthy priesthood holder. Someone who would be a good dad and would encourage me to be more than I could ever dream. I wanted to be with someone that adored me and told me that everyday. It sounded like a fairytale too good to be true,  but those were my conditions! I knew I wanted to be a young mom. I wanted to spend my 20s having babies and starting my own little family. As for what I wanted to do in life, I knew I wanted to write music and make an album. I wanted my songs to play on the radio. I wanted to see what it would be like to record music in a real studio and work with other musicians and talented producers.

 At that time I was dreaming all of this,  I was waiting for my boyfriend who was on a mission. While he said he adored me, his actions in the past had been questionable and proved otherwise. I had just started writing and recording music in my friend's basement. I made an EP and released it on iTunes. I was in school in the music program, learning a lot of amazing things about music, it was just not exactly what I wanted. I wanted recording studios not classrooms, and stages not masterclasses. I wanted my guitar not an accompanist and I wanted to write music rather than perform classical pieces.

Now, 5 years later, I look back on the past 5 years with so much gratitude and happiness for the direction my life has gone and how everything has turned out so far. I am married to a ridiculously hot man. I can wear tall heels and he still towers over me. He does sing like an angel and even better, he loves to sing with me and write songs for me. More importantly, He is a returned missionary and worthy priesthood holder. He is the best dad and it is because of him that I am more than I could have ever dreamed. He adores me more than anyone adores anyone and he tells me that 10 times a day. Together we had 2 adorable babies and we love being a little family of 4. I still continue to write music and I made an album. I got my single from my EP to play on the radio. I recorded my songs in a real studio with amazing musicians and producers.

It hasn't always been easy, and a lot of sacrifices were made, but because of that I was able to accomplish a lot of the goals I had set for myself. This has made me think hard about what I want to do next, to set new goals. There is so much more that I want to do with my life, music wise, family wise and in so many other aspects of life. I want to travel even more, I want to buy a house and meet tons of new people. I want to be giving to others around me. I want to be the best friend I can possibly be. I want to perform and write songs more than ever before. I want to be more patient. I want to learn how to multitask better. I want to become an even better cook. I want to serve in a church calling that scares me but helps me grow in the gospel, I want to influence others for the better. I want to be friendlier to people and take criticism as creative fuel to do just that much better.

Those are just some of the general ideas of things I want to do and I look forward to refining them and setting specific goals for myself.

I am excited for the next 5 years and I know that with the amazing support system that I have, and with my Savior, I will accomplish everything I set out to do. 

-A.

 *This is is more of a self-reflection post not a boast post
(ha, that rhymed).